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November 2013

You were wearing a huge novelty foam cowboy hat – m4w (Walmart)

You were walking through the aisles without a cart picking up items, apparently at random, and throwing them on the floor, then thrusting your pelvis forward while fist-pumping. It was vulgar. I think you were on drugs. I stalked you through the store until you opened a 5 quart bottle of motor oil and poured it all over the floor, at which point you were escorted out of the store while shouting racial slurs.

Anyway please contact me with the color of your hat so I know it’s you.

cowboy hat

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