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Category Archives: Pennsylvania

Zombie Walmart Missed Connections

Ok – these are real Walmart missed connections. Zombie missed connections for Halloween…

zombie beach party zombie walk



Why’d it have to be a snake?

Walmart girl – m4w (Harleysville)

Date: 2012-07-10, 7:19PM EDT
Reply to:

We had a great conversation going about pets. I was just about to ask you out, (despite the fact your pet was a snake!) then the line filled up with people waiting. If you dont see tis, ill be back! If you do see this, get back to me and lets chat!

• Location: Harleysville
• it’s NOT ok to contact this poster with services or other commercial interests


Shadyside Starbucks – m4w – 25

Date: 2012-04-06, 5:55PM EDT
Reply to:

You are sitting across from me at the Starbucks on center avenue. You have your hand on your face. Your mouth is open and you are staring at your computer. You are on Facebook. Say hi to me.

re: Shadyside Starbucks – w4m – 24 (center ave.)

Date: 2012-04-06, 6:14PM EDT
Reply to:

I see you over there, looking all prestigious in your red and white hoodie, moving chairs around like you own the place. How about you man up and send a frapp my way then we can talk.

re: re: Shadyside Starbucks – m4w – 25 ((center ave))

Date: 2012-04-06, 6:28PM EDT
Reply to:

I want to say hi to you so badly, but the one-legged asian man that you are flirting with looks very protective. Steal his leg and lets run away together. Between his leg and my third leg we can have six legs. We could even take a midget with us, and use our combined legs to make one more normal heighted person and have a threesome. Lets make this happen!

re re re: Shadyside Starbucks – w4m – 24 (center ave.)

Date: 2012-04-06, 6:53PM EDT
Reply to:

Hmmm, I like where this is going you naughty boy. One stipulation: midget must be Asian. As you can tell by now, I have a thing for Asians. No preference on sex of Asian, I swing both ways 😉 I can think of multiple ways to use the stilts this midget will be using…where shall we find this kinky midget and where shall we run away to? This is the sort of paperback romance I’ve been waiting for.

re re re re: Shadyside Starbucks – m4w – 25 ((center ave))

Date: 2012-04-06, 7:06PM CDT
Reply to:

Oh yes, we can do anything you want. If you want to have an Asian midget, then we shall get two Asian midgets to equal one regular midget. The two Asians will obviously be of male AND female gender, as to make one super hermaphroditic humanoid. They should satisfy your kinky, naughty curiosities. We shall run away to another Starbucks of course, where the three of us will engage in various illegal sex acts and the public with throw money at us for their entertainment, for I can think of no more liberal a place than Starbucks.


Filed under: Beyond Wally World, Starbucks

Stupid Asian worker

Walmart tonight – m4w – 23 (Dickson City)

I was standing in line waiting to ask you your number but the one stupid asian worker told me to change lines. We kept exchanging glances/smiles. Reply with what I was wearing.


Yeah, he sounds awesome.

She always falls for the gay guys

Fortune Star Chinese by Walmart – w4m – 24 (Butler, PA)

I saw you there Sunday, March 18th. (I think)
I was wearing a checkered pink top and jean capris. Long brown hair. I was with my family.
You were wearing shorts and a Slippery Rock Tshirt. It said something like, I like it on the bottom. You were with another guy.
You are super tall, maybe over 6’5″. You look like you might be a football player. I thought you were really cute.

My friend said she’s seen you there before on another Sunday.

If that’s you, shoot me a message with your pic so I know it was you. And include in the title of the email, SRU

Who hasn’t had an awkward pho?

Awkward pho in Harrisburg – w4w (The Garden)

Today at the Garden, sly peeks at each other in the mirror over chopsticks, big bowls of soup and PARENTS. I was totally going to give you my number but the vibe was a little questionable with your mom and dad standing right there! I was kicking myself as you were leaving. You have pixie short brown hair and great style……and a beautiful face. Apparently your parents dine out at Mangia Qui every now and then according to my friend who works there. I hope you are thinking along the same lines as me and find this post….or that we bump into each other again. Nice slingbacks by the way 🙂


Filed under: Beyond Wally World

And figure out how closely we’re related first…hopefully


Walmart: The first cousins dating site.

Walmart: Save money. Hook up with your kin.

Walmart: Save chromosomes. Live with your brother from another mother (literally).

Ok, I’m done.